Monday 3 October 2011

Claudia Messelodi - haiku 3 & 4

This week I am posting two more of Claudia's haiku. Don't forget that if you would like to read more of her haiku, please visit EOTE

Industrious ants run
back and forth the kitchen tiles
mind the feet that pass

Tireless ant files float
up and down the door hinges
peek a boo and hide

Why I like these haiku

Industrious ants run 
Ants in the house? Surely not? Out! Out! Out! Alarm! Sorry, I leave ants alone in the garden but kill them if they come in the house. I liked the feeling of busyness and industry as the ants try to avoid the feet that could well end their lives.

Tireless ants file float  

I have to admit I couldn't work out why she used "float" here. I had visions initially of ants floating through the air! But on re-reading I realised she meant that the ant files seem to float because they move so smoothly as they march up and down. I liked the way she turned an observation into a playful thing with the last line.

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